|Well, I tried.|
Here's a few descriptions of what I do, as a personal trainer:
-I motivate people.
-I design customized workout programs for each clients' goals.
-I teach people how to train efficiently, effectively, and pain-free.
-I teach proper form.
-I help people get stronger and more mobile and more comfortable in their own skins.
-I crack the occasional (OK, maybe not so occasional) bad joke to lighten up the sessions and make people realize that life isn't all that serious a business.
-I give people a reason (or 20) to get moving.
-I give people the tools and education they need to eat right for their goals.
-I make myself available for questions and concerns at all times.
-I help people progress to places they never thought possible.
-I go above and beyond the call of duty (I've been known to drive clients to farmer's markets and teach them how to pick and cook healthfully, and more).
Here is what I don't do, as a personal trainer:
-I do not lose your weight for you.
-I do not do the work for you.
-I do not let you get away with half-assing anything.
-I am not anyone's babysitter (unless, of course, they are actually a baby, and I volunteered for the job).
Training with me twice a week is not going to magically melt your troubles away. You need to do your homework. Your diet needs to be spot on. Seriously. This is 70% of the equation. If you're not willing to change your diet, if you're not willing to move your body when you're not at the gym, if you're not willing to take accountability for your own role in your health, you're not going to see the results you want to see. Period.
I would love to be your fairy godmother. Truly I would. But in the end, you need to grant your own wishes. All I can do is give you the tools you need to get there. You are the one who needs to use them.